Even a little pussy can kill you…

A wisely fractured very fallacious biblical fable…

There was a poor Hebrew who was sold as a slave back in the days of Wise King Solomon & as he was a most righteous practitioner of the holy Jewish kabala when he’d heard of a conspiracy to harm both the life & limb of the King & most of his 700 concubines by one of his previously trusted eunuchs who had often been rebuffed of his desire to pleasure the concubines he reported the matter to the authorities & the evil miscreant was then promptly judged condemned & put to death in a most grizzly & ugly way as was the fashion back then in the Holy Land… (sic)

As a reward for his righteous deed in saving the life of Wise old King Solomon & his 700 comely concubines Sol brought the slave in from the slave pen into his inner court & there & then in front of all his ministers publicly declared he would give the slave his freedom & place him in charge of all of the King’s concubines which the King promptly ordered with a “SO MOTE IT BE“ & the matter was sworn into Jewish law…

Wise old King Solomon then gave another order for his chief surgeon to enter the court & immediately castrate the Hebrew slave & while the eyes of the poor slave were still watering profusely he also ordered the man’s right foot be promptly nailed to the floor of the inner chamber…

Although to speak out in such circumstances without being first bidden by your liege lord (Snicker) was always punishable by a rotten horrible death the brave young Hebrew spoke out in great pain & distress of soul to the omnipotently divine & extremely Wise old King Solomon thus…

“GREAT KING & MOST WISE LORD… DID YOU NOT DECLARE YOU WERE GOING TO SET YOUR SERVANT FREE AS A REWARD FOR FAITHFULLY SERVING YOU AT THE RISK OF HIS VERY LIFE” & in great tenderness understanding grace peace tolerance & unlimited wisdom for his poor naive slave’s ignorance old King Solomon mercifully smiled down from his throne onto his new harem chief & declared that from that very moment on the slave was indeed a free man…

He was now free to run around in circles as often as he wished &\or to nail his other foot to the floor himself any time he got bored or became dissatisfied with his new lot in life as the King’s chief eunuch…

One of the morals of this apocryphal story is that sex is always potentially dangerous & even in the very beginning life in the New World Order really did suck big time & it always has ever since & the harsh reality is it’s full of never ending spin & illogical roadblocks to happiness placed there at the whim of the divine right of kings so you can only ever even begin to get even with them in some other life long into the mists of future time…

Thus the brave Hebrew slave was indeed rewarded with his freedom & he lived happily ever after until about three months later during the feast of Shelters when he became so despondent he actually DID nail his other foot to the floor just to see if it would relieve the total freaking boredom of his reward for being so damned faithful & gullible…

After this desperate act he caught toxoplasmosis from some crap one of the concubine’s royal kittens had deposited there the day before & died of a fever so the only part of this story to ever make it into the official Talmud is that even a little pussy can kill both the faithless & evil man as well as the most righteous & faithful of the kings servants too even if it‘s not yours so you might as well just keep practicing the anal part of the kabala…

Give all pussy a wide birth & keep prayerful faithful & true to your heart & be ever vigilant to stay out of things that don’t concern you so as to allow the Yod Hod & God of the kabala to protect you from the inherent danger all pussy brings to the serious seeker of kabala enlightenment…

Here ends the lesson… (Snicker-Snicker)

ROBBY (Ben-Astor) DANIEL…         ®        31/8/11

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About spacelizardlaw

Hmmm... Christ implied prophetical people like me get monuments built for them once they're dead so Ye-Hah & Whoopee & don't spare the embalming cream...
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